Monday, 24 May 2010

Revised Storyboard

While talking the new storyboard over with Natasha and Steve, it was brought to my attention that there were a few problems. The first being that the mother originally appeared far too happy when beckoning the son back into the garden to play with her. Considering she has just given up on her dream of winning the gardening contest so she can play with her son, its only natural what she should look and act rather sad and disappointed. But at the same time, I believe she would try to put on a happy face and smile for her son so as not to make him feel bad. The whole point of the giving-the-ball-back gesture and letting him play is that she wants her son to be happy; being miserable herself and going back into the house will only make him feel sad and alone, like he's the one who's caused her to give up. And while that may be true, I can't imagine the mother would want to put that on her son's shoulders. So I decided to redraw her panel to make give her a sad smile and gently beckoning with the hands rather than cheerful waving; thus showing her sadness despite her trying to hide it.

The second problem was the boy's realisation of what his mother has given up for him and figuring out what he can do to help. My original plan for the scene seems a little awkward with hindsight, as there was no key point to show the switch flicking in his brain. Karina came up with an excellent suggestion of having the boy go to throw the ball to his mum in the garden, then stop just before he lets go as the realisation dawns. I think this will come across as much more emotionally powerful and effective, so I have added it into the revised storyboard which you can see below.

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